We celebrated a birthday today. An incredibly precious birthday. The birthday of one who feels like our blood, through and through. It has been an absolute riot, and it completely pains me to not be able to share more about it. I would HAPPILY share pictures with those who want to know, but as always, it has to be private and not on the blog :/ Always a disappointment for me.

We ate yummy food. Played well. There was a productive nap. More yummy food. Gifts a couple of different times. The day ended on a sugar rush, but thankfully, it was short lived, and the crash wasn’t bad. Somehow, the baby room is already so quiet. Everyone is wiped, but happy.

And here I am, heavy hearted. I KNOW we have to live in the present. I am so aware that what-ifs do absolutely no good. But the future is so unknown, and I cannot imagine not having this dear one with us for every birthday in their childhood and beyond. I must slow my heart and brain down and just enjoy. I promise, I know this.

But man. If you guys could know this tiny person I know. You would understand completely.

Happy birthday, dear one 💜 I love you so much, I could cry. I love you.

I just have to put these into a blog so they don’t get lost, because this girl is SO stinking hilarious!

We had morning meeting at breakfast, like always. I let the kids know the day was starting out colder than yesterday, so don’t be too lazy with toques and mitts. Ok? Ok, mom. Standard non-listening practice. Everyone took off to get ready for the day. And this monkey comes up dressed like this 🤣

I was completely bewildered. I called her out by simply saying “Shorts?” And she looked at me like I was nuts, followed with her reply – “I’ll have ski pants!” Nope. But good try. 😂 That girl and her outfits. I have no doubt her teachers get a kick out of them as much as I do.

Then there was this. After school, I was frosting a cake for a birthday tomorrow, and Wave came to help me put some of the ingredients away. She tucked the food coloring and vanilla into their spot, and then, confused, asked me where to put the hand sanitizer. Guys.

Like. How innocent can you be?? Its almond extract. She giggled at herself and put it away with the vanilla, and skipped off to who knows where. But it kept me laughing. I love her.

Thanks for the fun today, Wavy 💜 I love you!

Dekker has anticipated his school ski trip for a long while, and he finally got to go this week. Wednesday was the day. He was gone early, back in the evening, and there was a very short window of time between getting home and going to youth 😅 In that time, however, he sat down and said he couldn’t wait to kayak.

Because his winter thing was over. So now he is ready to anticipate the next season. And I kind of get it.

I started listing today. Projects. Some big and others not as big. Not specifically geared towards spring, either, haha! But it feels like its time to get some bigger things done for. I don’t know. Preparation? Beats me, but I do get what he’s feeling.

Some things are like, tomorrow things. Make the dessert for the upcoming birthday. Scrape the ramp. Things like that.

But others are rebooting bigger areas of the home. Cleaning up things that have sat for too long. Trying to get our new en suite stocked up with our things. All that good stuff.

And then stuff that definitely needs doing but can wait. The bookshelf is a mess. Hanging up pictures that are sitting and waiting to be hung in multiple rooms. Putting away yarn from abandoned projects.

Anyway. The list feels long, but also important and doable. Not quickly 🤣 but eventually. There may be a call out for a dump run in our near future. SO much stuff we finally just have to ditch!!

Wish me luck!!

🎶 My spirit is willing, but my flesh is so weak 🎵

A couple of adorable people moments at the breakfast table.

I talked to them kids about hot lunch. This Friday at school is hot dog day. I mentioned that I had heard it was coming, but I had no forms, and they were in fact due first thing this morning. Rowan and Wavy went running while Solly dug into his hoodie pockets in search of his. He pulled out a folded up paper with confidence, but as he opened it, he casually said “Oh, thats not my hot dog form, its just my watermelon shark.” Guys. He wasn’t kidding.

I thought that was so adorable, lol! Solly is so innocent and sweet. And frankly, I think his watermelon shark is bomb. Thanks, Art Hub, for teaching my kids to draw the coolest things!

And then there’s Laela who had a babysitting gig last night that went a bit later than anticipated. She was totally stoked and HAPPY to stay. She came home nice and late, waving some bills around proudly, just beaming!! And this morning, she was wiped!!! 😅 She started to stretch, and then twitched and crumpled back up. She said “Owwwww, I slept too good and now I’m all hurty!”

I thought it was super cute of her.

Both of them.

ALL of them.

💜

Guys. It was just a really beautiful day in so many ways. We are so grateful.

I spent the morning and a chunk of the afternoon with Cher, my best friend, who I have barely seen in more than a week.

I had a surprise visit from a friend from camp. The kids were SO ripped to have missed his pop in.

We spent a good hour after bedtime with our pastor and his wife, who came by our home solely to listen to us and love us. It was amazing. A total honour.

I am very grateful for our day. For the lovely people around us. For the gifts of care, concern, and corn dogs we are given 😅 Not kidding. Seriously, though, the blessings we experience are immeasurable.

And for that – for today – we praise the Lord.

This boy. Our dear Rowan. Turns eleven today. This year of Rowan has been totally incredible.

He is really, truly figuring himself out. He has way more good days than bad. It doesn’t mean all days are easy by any means, but he will put in new efforts because he can see the fruits of his labour, and he prefers that result to the alternative. Along with that, he has been able to have closer, happier, healthier relationships with his siblings, which is SO amazing to finally witness! He loves to wrestle with Dekker, and he and Solly could talk all day about things like Lego, Minecraft, etc. Rowan and Laela have always clicked easier, and they continue to. And now, just in the last few weeks, Rowan is developing a soft spot for her. She loves everyone without holding back, including him, and has immediately melted into his love for her.

It is SO nice to see him let down a bit, and then slowly watch his siblings follow suit. Easily the best part of this last year over all.

We celebrated his birthday all weekend, which really turned out perfectly considering we had a sick day in there, and important church stuff in there, too. This way, he got his meals, he got to watch a movie he was excited about, and he got presents on both days. Check out what auntie gave him! 😳😍

I think it will be REALLY precious to him over the years. Right now, its super cool, but as he ages, I hope he can treasure the time and care that went into this, to celebrate how beautiful he is.

This boy is a very important part of our family. He is deeply loved and treasured. As disjointed as this weekend ended up being, it was clear he felt special and celebrated.

Goodness, Rowan, how we love you. I see EVERY side of our family in your beautiful face, and I am positively loving watching you grow up! I love you and love you and love you again.

Happy eleventh birthday, Rowan!! 🥳

Yesterday, I was trying to sort out in my head how we were going to organize this morning.

Many of us were feeling really sick yesterday.

Dekker was needed at church because there was a fundraiser going on behalf of a missions trip in which he is participating.

I had to get a big pot of soup to church.

I knew if I was sick, or any of the babies were sick, I’d have to hang back.

Brady couldn’t go without me because his minivan was at the mechanic and he can’t get into the bus on his own.

He couldn’t stay home with just the babies.

Do I send the soup with someone else, maybe??

Man alive the list just went on!!!

But this morning, I woke up feeling totally fine. Brady was super exhausted (because chemo) but didn’t feel sick. NONE of the kids felt sick. It was incredible! So we could ALL go to church!!!

When we arrived, I got Brady his wheelchair and then ran Munchie Mix in first, since they’re still in a baby bucket. As Munchie is the most content baby of ALL babies, I left the bucket under the coat rack and ran back out to get the pot of soup. By the time I brought the soup in, someone had snagged baby from the car seat for the service! Of course, they came and told me, but it was SO nice!!!

I drank coffee, snuggled with Solly, took communion, and listened to the first service of lent. It was so peaceful. Except when my baby alarm went off for one of the babies in the nursery, and instead of vibrating, it started beeping like crazy 🤣 That was new, and I didn’t like it, hahaha! But I lived, as did those around me.

The fundraiser was a soup lunch, for which I brought a big pot of my cheesy chicken noodle soup (which is actually more widely known as crack chicken, but I can’t make a drug joke at church 😂) I made a handful of rounds to our table, getting a few bowls of soup for a few different folks before finally sitting down for lunch. It thrilled my heart to watch my dear Spoons eating independently SO well. Taking big bites, wiping their own chin dribbles with a napkin, and drinking from a regular cup, not a sippy. Someone was SO proud of themself. It was super sweet to see my very grown up toddler at work 💜

I am so grateful we were able to go to church after all, and not have to miss the service, the baby sharing, or the participation and support for the fundraiser. Thank you, Lord, for healing our bodies enough that we could attend today 💜

Today is a bit of a hard one to break down. With Rowan’s birthday approaching, he begged to celebrate over the weekend. Today we got up and he was eagerly chopping fruit in the kitchen. Brunch begun in the late morning, and while it looked and tasted absolutely delicious, a handful of us could hardly eat. There was an unfortunate sweep of nausea across many of us. It definitely turned out to be the right choice to split his meals over a couple of days. Nevertheless, the day moved forward, and Rowan is completely happy with how it went. I worried he’d be a bit let down, but nope, he is totally satisfied with day one of his three day birthday 😅

Brady, being the chemo guy, took a really nice long nap this afternoon, which I think many of us were fiercely jealous of, haha! He woke up all refreshed. Punk.

We finished off the day with leftover fruit salad and biscuits brought to our door, warm and fresh 💜 It really couldn’t have been timed out any better.

I will admit that I don’t feel especially strong today, but forward we move, no matter the circumstance. We are so incredibly fortunate to be cared for so well and to have things as good as we do. It is undeniable that God shows up for us absolutely endlessly, and for that, we are SO thankful.

Its going to be an early to bed kind of night, and I am completely here for it. As is Brady. And LD. And Laela. And Wavy. And Dekker. I think thats it.

Goodnight, friends.

I promised Laela I’d make fun of her on the blog today. She was less invested in the idea, but I’m still going to go with it.

As a disclaimer, I pretty much always ask my kids when I post about them, especially if I’m teasing them or if I think they might not like a picture or story being public. Especially now that the two are in high school, their friends sometimes read the blogs, and I just don’t want anyone to be too embarrassed. So she knows I’m posting this. End of disclaimer.

Today, I had to take Brady to an appointment, thanks to his minivan bucking this weather. Don’t get me started (said the van.) The man still needs his chemo! Cycle #7 begins today!

A Costco order came while a couple of the kids were home, so once the delivery person was gone, they brought in the groceries to put away. She texted me about a couple of things, like whether to put certain fruit in the fridge, etc. And then I got this one. It took me a second.

Did you figure it out?

Chimichangas.

I laughed SO HARD.

Don’t judge our purchase of convenience food. This week has been a MESS and it is SO helpful from time to time to buy some garbage to eat 🤣

Of course this is the part where Laela insists that I add that Rowan said it first, which he staunchly refutes. But. It happened, and it brought some great laughs, which I can admit have been a bit harder to come by these days. So I’ll take it.

Ching changs 🤣 Amazing.

WOW did the cold ever snap overnight!!! 🥶 We actually had to boost Brady’s van in order to get him to work this morning.

My bus was not a particularly happy camper, but happier than the mini, so it did the job. Once Brady was boosted and out the door, I let my vehicle run for a good while so I could safely, warmly drive to the city shortly thereafter to take one of the babes for a visit.

I drove in a second time to retrieve aforementioned babe, and man alive, that van is SO over the cold.

As am I. Maybe thats part of why I feel so grumpy? Maybe? I don’t know. The day did not end super well, and I am ready for sleep.

Sorry for the downer post. Some days feel extra challenging. Hopefully I’ll sleep a bit more tonight and be a lot more fun tomorrow.

🥱