The Daily Hailey

I got to have a bath today. It was SO cozy and warm. I scrubbed my body and shaved my legs. I watched some Youtube but eventually paused it as I got lost in a rabbit hole of videos on my phone. And I don’t mean reels on Facebook or trash like that. I found myself watching videos of LD from way, way back to when they were new here. They both filled and broke my heart in one fell swoop. I love that child so darn much.

Yes. Foster parents do get too attached. Thats the whole point of this. To love these children desperately, like they are from your own flesh and blood, so they can KNOW that love!! No matter how good they have it here, or elsewhere, or for how long, there is going to be trauma to unpack, and I will NOT have these kids leave our home feeling like they were “just” foster kids. Nope nope nope. First smiles. First steps. Tickles. Messy meals. Bubble baths. New words. Jokes. All of that stuff is GOLD, whether that kid came out of your body or not. Their need for familial love is worlds apart more important than our desire not to feel grief when they go.

• This is NOT me saying LD is going. Just reminiscing and feeling that deep ache of love and uncertainty.

Anyway. I really enjoyed soaking in the tub, as well as in the rabbit hole that was LD’s infancy. It was a precious time. As have been all the times spent with LD 💜

It was a happy day. Cher came back to work, which has been a long time coming with her household and ours alternating really yucky sicknesses. Mostly us over here 😅 But neither of us wanting to pass anything funky to the other. We spent the day getting some things done, but also lots of catching up and just playing babies together. It was nice.

Munchie Mix is babbling away. Wanting to eat food. Trying to crawl. Its a busy time for that one! Meanwhile, the toddlers are talking more and more, and communication between them is SO fun to witness. They would invite each other into their games, calling the other by name and saying things like “Hop on!” in reference to a ride-on toy, or “play with guys!” talking about Little People. They would come give hugs if one was sad or let down. They’d problem solve together, LD regularly chasing us down with Spoons’ sippy cup, exclaiming “Wadda, please!” It is VERY cute.

Once everyone came home from school and nap time was over, there was more snuggling than usual. Not in a sickness way, thank goodness, but in a content way. I loved it. Of course, that flipped on its head after supper, but it made for a smooth, swift bedtime, for which I was very thankful! 😅 Some days thats simpler.

Time to get M&M down now. I believe the pooping is done for the evening. 🤞 We shall see!

I have yet to crochet a wearable for myself that I really like. I’ve made one cardigan and it was stiff and crappy and I never wore it. It just didn’t work out. But that ship has finally sailed, and I was able to make something I love for myself!! So, as tends to happen, I decided to make one for a kid, too. Today, I finished one for Laela 💜 

Pretty, hey?? It fits her so nicely, and this particular yarn just falls so nicely, is weighted so well, and the texture can’t be beat. Of course, now that I’ve discovered it is THE yarn for crocheting cardis, it’s being discontinued 😩 just to hurt my feelings. 

Discontinued yarn or not, hopefully this is the beginning of my skills expanding a bit to include some cozy sweaters. I love making blankets, but for those of us who want to wear a blanket out of the house, cardigans feel like the next best option. 

Still SO much to learn and create! 

I took one of the babes for a visit this afternoon. Because of the day of the week it is, we have a few kids going in different directions. With that, I only brought Rowan, Solly, and another one of the babies along. A smaller group that usual, thats for sure.

When I dropped off at the visiting apartment, I didn’t feel content. It didn’t feel good. Like. Everyone was safe, of course. Visits are supervised. No one is alone. Everything is truly ok. But it was a less familiar visit situation than most, and I felt yucky leaving. Two hours to kill.

What was really unexpectedly nice was that both of my boys were SO STOKED to sit and read their library books in the van. They asked specifically if we could just park and read. To which I said YES because I had also planned for this possibility and had brought some crocheting along!! So sat still. Quiet music going. They read. I crocheted. We just. Had. Peace. Even though my heart didn’t feel peace.

The time finally came and I went and picked up from the visit. BIG content hugs. Familiarity. Exclamations upon entering the van. Everyone was happy to be back together. Lots of tickles and giggles getting buckled up for the drive home.

We got home and plunked the little one in a high chair to supplement their supper of popcorn and juice. Meanwhile, the house was wrapping up for the day around the usual time. It wasn’t long after getting home that the first round of bedtime happened and the house got that much quieter.

While the visit today was not my favorite thing, and it didn’t feel good to me, my body was grateful for an afternoon away. Some rest time. Music. Crocheting. No fighting or refereeing or arguing. Just hanging out, and resting my body, doing something I enjoy.

The iced coffee didn’t hurt either.

Laela is home! I have no pictures, but you’ll have to take my word for it. She is well and happy and tired and she really enjoyed her first ever youth retreat 💜 I LOVED youth retreats growing up, and its so fun to see my kids revel in them the ways I did, making friends from other towns, learning new songs, and experiencing that type of community that a person can only find at camp.

As independent as Laela is, I was thrilled when she texted me this morning and assured me she was having a blast, but was ready to come home 💜 Now, she is home. Well fed. Slow moving. Rowan did her usual dish slot, and everyone went to bed without struggle. Which is handy because tomorrow is a busy one.

Please, Lord, grant us good solid rest, and strength for the day that ONLY comes from you 💜 Amen.

We did a little work this morning. We’re short a Laela, but the rest of us agreed to get some jobs done this morning so we could rest in the afternoon during nap time. We dug into our huge toy bin upstairs and organized it enough to make it overflow slightly less. I got some things off of what we call our camp table that lives in the kitchen. We had some more goals, but some things come up, as they tend to do, and a few things got mildly derailed. but it definitely wasn’t too bad. Everyone got their baths and I think at least one kid practiced piano. We’ll call it a successful morning.

We lunched and sat a little, and Brady and I watched an episode or two of our show. But when we could hear the babies start talking and we knew it was time to get the day back in action, we decided to break it up a little bit.

Babies got up and we all hauled out to the city for a low pressure trip. We had only two goals.

Go to Michaels to buy some of the yarn they are discontinuing that I LOVE.

Drop off a donation at Value Village.

And there was the promise for a fast food supper for the kids.

Everyone happily went along with the plan, and in we went! Michaels wasn’t a huge success but I’d say a moderate success. Almost all of the colors I was hoping for were gone, but there were some, so I’ll take it. And then, I tweaked the plan a little bit and asked if Brady would leave me at Value Village while he went to pick up supper. So while they all picked up food, I thrifted a little on my own. It was a really nice break 💜 I left the store with three books, two puzzles, and shoes for the three older boys. Again, a success, for sure!

I haven’t gone out in a long time. It was refreshing, but my body is tired. Wind down time has arrived.

Wish us luck for getting to church tomorrow!!

The kids were off school today, which often calls for a pretty peaceful home day. That day was not today.

It began with a social worker visit. LD’s worker, to be exact. She came and visited. Asked her questions. Took her notes. Then left.

Shortly thereafter, Spoons’ worker came. We discussed some changes afoot in that particular case plan and spitballed ideas for some change. This is a new worker to us, and she doesn’t like to speculate or look too far ahead. Which I get, but I also enjoy the candor we had before with previous workers. I guess we’ll see.

We ate lunch a little early and napped Munchie Mix.

Early afternoon, my piano kids went off to a rehearsal, and the rest of us loaded into the bus for a doctors appointment. We did not forget M&M. Just let baby nap a bit before hitting the road.

We saw our lovely family doctor for the first time in a long while. We caught up just a little, got a skin issue checked, and tweaked a couple of meds for a couple of us. LD and Spoons left with a sticker for each hand, and the other kids got a boston cream donut on the way out.

We got home, put babies down for a late nap, and took a breather.

Around 5pm, I took Laela to the church for a youth retreat.

Except the event on the calendar was an hour off, so we went home, pumped out a fast supper, and I took her back for 6pm. Came home and caught the end of supper.

Got everyone down.

🥱

I am pooped, but it was a good day. Time to wrap the day up a bit. Popcorn and The Good Doctor is the order of the evening!

Last summer was surprisingly smooth for our family. I think in part, it was because we kept a bit busier. Kids were in a few more things, and we made efforts to have less idle time. And it paid off! So as the weather starts to look up a bit, we’re all starting to think in the direction of the seasons to come.

Shorts and tank tops. Fires. Beach days. The camp chef. Toddlers on bikes. Big kids in kayaks and on paddle boards. The golf cart. Later bedtimes. Sunsets. Bike rides in the day. The spray park. Maybe a couple good crashing storms if we’re lucky.

Low. Pressure.

I know spring is not upon us yet. But I’m letting myself go there a bit, and just coast in the whats-to-come. I’m not wishing time away. Not at all. I know better. But I can happily anticipate warm weather without guilt, I believe.

It has been a LONG stretch of mean illnesses, and today, Cher came back to our place to start working for us, once again! It was WAY too bad over here to have anyone through, but today was the day! She walked over this morning, and once I knew she’d be close, I went out to harass her, just for funsies, like I do from time to time. It timed out perfectly with Laela leaving for school. When she saw Cher in the distance, she picked up her pace, which just opened the door for a footrace to auntie. I won, in case you were wondering. But my body wasn’t thrilled, so it was the one and only footrace I participated in today. Cher did, however, take a picture of Laela and I because she continued to school and we continued home. As underdressed as I was, I thought it was kind of a lovely picture.

Thanks for taking it, Cher 💜

We got some things done in the house today, but I’d say it was pretty lovely and low pressure. A really peaceful first day back. I am very grateful for the help I have, the best friend I have, and the house and family I have. We are so fortunate 💜

Ok! Final diaper change over here and the last babe is off to bed!

Yesterday, we talked wins. And I have a couple more from today that I’d like to share. Continuing from yesterday…

Win number four. I had one commitment out of the house today. I had to go to Saskatoon in the afternoon. After the spontaneous snow we got, the roads were PACKED and ICY. Most people online who usually say “Guys, its just winter conditions” were more on the “STAY HOME” side of things. And before I even had to think about it in depth, the person I needed to go see got in touch and suggested we reschedule, even though I was the one driving and she was not. What a weight lifted off my shoulders!!!

Win number five. Brady took another good solid sick day at home. While feeling somewhat better today, he is still physically exhausted, which makes total sense to me, being that I’m still recovering from all of that. But we did have coffee together today 💜 which we haven’t done in a very long time, and it was really nice for my heart.

Win number six. Our lovely accessibility expert/contractor/friend came today and made the finishing touches on our en suite 😍 I had every intention of todays post having pictures but now that the baby is napping in our room, I realize I didn’t take all the ones I wanted to share. So maybe tomorrow. But its done!! Or, as LD would say, DUNNNNNNNNNNNNN.

I think thats all for today. I was so happy to stay home. So happy to have a coffee with Brady. So happy to have my bathroom done. We sure have a lot to be thankful for, don’t we? 💜 Man. Praise God for making some things just SO easy.