I took it upon myself to make the kids each a blanket for Christmas this year. I had considered this early in the year as something I would try. And then all hell broke loose and for the life of me, I could not find the strength within myself to crochet. Not. A. Stitch. The entire time Brady was gone, I could not do it.

You’ve probably noticed, but its become a real passion of mine, and when Brady came back home mid-April, the crochet bug bit hard and I got to it!

It got down the wire, but it got done!!

All five kids got a blanket for Christmas!!

Wavy was the first to open a present yesterday, and she opted for the biggest one. Her blanket. Her reaction was an excellent one to start off with because she was SO happy! She unzipped her bag and shrieked “CROCHETIN’!!!”

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Waverly’s blanket is made using the harlequin stitch in vertical stripes. I used multiple purples (multipurples?) alternating with a sparkly white yarn. I put coordinating tassels along the edges.

Rowan was the next kid to open his blanket. He might be my most sentimental child, and he was so excited to have his blanket. Immediately, he asked if he could swap out his current blanket for his new one.

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I had a very different idea for Rowan’s blanket, and bought a bunch of blues in preparation for it. It wasn’t long into that pattern that I realized the pattern would drive Rowan completely crazy. So I opted for something simpler and softer. Ombre blues, diagonally, using the moss stitch. It has a really thick beefy border all around it.

Solomon was next, and he was one I didn’t think would care too terribly much about it. I was right, hahaha! Not that he didn’t like it, but the excitement of present opening far superseded the excitement around each actual gift. It wasn’t just the blanket. It was everything he opened, lol!

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Solomon’s blanket was the first one I finished. Its made with triangles in horizontal stripes, with one big blue tassel in each corner. I couldn’t tell you why but, for some reason, this blanket just screamed Solly’s name to me.

Dekker was next. At this point, the big kids definitely knew they had one coming, and they had saved their blankets closer to the end of their gifts. Dekker was really excited to check his out!

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Dekker’s blanket is probably my favorite. Its plaid! I made it by crocheting basically a big mesh blanket, and then I made long chains that I weaved in and out of the spaces. There is SO much versatility to this pattern! But I will say, I was commissioned to make this exact blanket for someone else this season, and I believe it went over well! The woven plaid blankets are SO cool!

Laela saved her blanket for last 💜 Which is fitting because hers was absolutely a labour of love. Do you remember my huge crochet blunder? I made her an entire blanket and it all fell apart. So it felt like a lot was riding on her liking her blanket.

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Laela’s blanket was made off of a pattern that I modified off of a pattern I found for a floor mat. I made it in a crochet style called c2c, or corner to corner. Its a specific stitch pattern similar to a block stitch, and I worked off of a graph to know when to change/add colors. It was a painstaking process, and there were about a million ends to tuck in at the end, but we got it done! The day before Christmas!!

While I don’t expect it to happen for long, all five kids wanted to sleep with their new blanket last night. 💜 Aaaaand it was fun to harass them first thing in the morning for pictures! Isn’t that what parents are for?

Crocheting has graduated from a hobby to a real love of mine. I think I might need to step it up and advertise myself a little 😬 If you are in need of some custom crochet, I’m your girl!

Have a cozy day!

As always, I will preface this post by saying I know Christmas isn’t all about the presents. Not at all. But consider that this post is easy, and can be written mostly in advance, so its what you get! Haha!

There was a lot of repetition in this years gifts. I had big goals of doing a full homemade Christmas for everyone, and that just didn’t happen. And thats ok. I let it go a long time ago. I didn’t have all my ducks in a row to even specifically get the categories together. But I’ll tell you what I did get to.

All five kids got a hover ball! They’re supposed to be thrown and come back to you. We haven’t quite mastered the art yet. Mostly we chuck them and they fly around on the floor like cats. But they are well loved and the kids are super excited about them.

All five kids got a hoodie. They are all in the family of that particular style of cozy clothes with the white cuffs with a red stripe. They’re all different shades of grey/blue, and some are zippered while others are pullovers. I’ve scoured Value Villages throughout the year for them to all have something that at least kind of matched.

All five kids got a paid of jammie pants. Dekker got thinner red plaid from a liquidation store. Laela got fleece mermaid scaled pants. Rowan got fleece pants with green, black, and grey triangles. Solly got thinner green plaid pants. Wavy got white cozy fleece lined leggings with a fair isle pattern on them.

All five kids got a book of lifesavers.

All five kids got a Christmas book. Dekker got Geronimo Stilton’s Christmas Carol. Laela got a Christmas themed Narwal and Jelly book. Rowan got a Christmas Robert Munsch book. Solly’s was my favorite – he got a book called Vegetables in Christmas Underwear, and its exactly as it sounds. Wavy got a book called You are My Merry Little Christmas, which is a cute take off of You are My Cupcake, which we really like.

The kids got a new devotional to share. We finished a really great one up earlier this year, and this is a new one by the same author. They are REALLY good devotionals.

Aaaaand all five kids got something else but thats going to be its own post.

I got sparkle balls that Brady ordered secretly earlier this year.

Brady got festive fancy underwear, a beard shaping tool, and a mug that speaks the truth.

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My mom got potholders. I know. Thats it. But she’s nice and understood 💜

And there is more to come, but we have the opportunity to celebrate more in a few days with family 💜

For today, we celebrate the birth of Christ, without which we wouldn’t be so fortunate.

From our family to yours, we wish you the merriest of Christmases. I hope your garbage collector is as cute as ours!

The last couple of days have been rich with celebrating. I’m beating myself up that I don’t have pictures to show, but I was present and occupied, and I think thats ok 🙂

We had our day in Kinistino, and then spent the next evening driving around Saskatoon, looking at lights. And then tonight, Christmas Eve, we spent time with more of our people – those beautiful across the street neighbours I mention so often. They knew my mom was staying with us for a few days over Christmas, and invited her to join. We celebrated Christmas as a family, and it really felt how it should, if that makes any sense at all. Normal. Warm. Friendly. The kids played downstairs, and the rest of us hung out upstairs, prepped food, sipped sangria, and chatted. The conversation flowed easily and the food was unreal. It was a family Christmas gathering at its finest! The kids had the pleasure of opening thoughtful gifts that hit the mark beautifully.

We stayed until just after 7:00, and once everyone was home and unloaded, every one of them was ready for bed. Even Dekker asked to go to bed early. It was just time. We had had such a nice time. It was that good, mushy, content tired feeling. You get it.

As lovely as our evening was, I am absolutely beside myself with exhaustion. I am ready to pack it in for the night. Goodnight, friends. I hope you all have a merry Christmas tomorrow, filled with light and laughter.

Believe it or not, there are just not enough hours in a day! And today is no different! Conveniently, most of the kids are quiet and extra tired today, and those that aren’t are occupied and happy. Wavy and Laela are reading. Solly switches between reading and tracing his hands on paper. Also he does this.

Rowan is making Christmas cards at the island. Dekker went with my mom to help with some grocery shopping. Its SO cool when they age to a point where they can actually help help and its not just an experience, haha!

Brady is in Saskatoon, getting his bloodwork done, as he always does before a chemo cycle. He’s going to kill some time and run a few errands after that, and hopefully be able to pick up his chemo meds before he comes home! And also yarn… Because thats always the case. Don’t worry, he’s not bitter.

Meanwhile, I’m blogging (big duh) and plan to wrap presents and get some addresses together during nap time. I’ve made a big batch of party mix and need to babysit that a little bit this afternoon. I’m also planning out my next crochet project that I am SO excited for! It might be for me. It might be for sale. I’m not sure yet. But stay tuned! Just have to decide the official color palette…

Might have to choose all three, hahaha!

I hope your day is relaxed and productive all at once like mine 💜

We had the blessed opportunity to join some dear friends of ours out at their home for the day. We know them from our lake, and we live far enough away from one another that we haven’t seen each other since this summer. We were honoured to be invited, and eagerly accepted their invitation. We got the kids up this morning in the dark, got them dressed and in the van. We grabbed breakfast at Tims and took the all to familiar drive in their direction. They leave closer to PA, which is the direction of our lake, and we really enjoy that drive! It was only fitting that we drove that way to spend the day with our camp people 💜 

We spent the day chatting about our lives and catching up while the kids played hard as if no time had passed. They just fell right into one another. It did my heart sooooo good. Between the nonstop conversation, we ate delicious meals and yummy treats, and we even spent some time outside! They poured a bit beautiful rink, and we even shared a fire 🔥 which made it feel even MORE like camp! Summer can’t come soon enough! Though today was rich all on its own 😍 

Once we got Solly back into boots, he was actually maybe the best first time hockey player from our family!! I was impressed!

These two have marriage plans in the works since they were informed their spontaneous summer marriage didn’t count 😆

Oreo was a very happy girl! She had a few boundary issues but even the little ones were less nervous around her by the end! Win!

These two ladies were basically attached at the hip. Miss Avery is SUCH a mommy 😍

We sat in the living room after supper, with only Christmas lights on. Their place was lavish with lights, and it felt so comfortable and lovely. We were at total ease, and that isn’t something that one just finds anywhere. Especially in our new circumstances, we haven’t been out in peoples homes yet at all, so this was a bit of a dry run, and it was smooth and simple. 

We are SO grateful for today, with our friends. We anticipate so many more visits over the years to come! Sometimes friendships grow slowly, and sometimes there is an undeniable click. And we have found the latter. 

Thank you Lord 💜

Goodnight friends.

The day wrapped up hard yesterday. I won’t get into it. But I was a wreck. Since my meds have been sorted out, I’ve been so much clearer and level, but goodness yesterday just pushed me over the edge. I struggled and failed and did not come out on top. I still felt it this morning, but the show still had to go on! Now that I am tucked in upstairs for a rest, I am able to see clearly that there were some successes along the way. Some. Definitely not all. But it counts.

Yesterday in the midst of struggle, my kids all ate their supper without complaining. I was on my own with them, and felt completely gutless. I opted to make scrambled eggs, but rather than just doing toast and eggs, which is perfectly acceptable and happens a lot here, I fried up some leftover peppers to go into the eggs, as well as adding leftover bacon and shredded cheese. My kids don’t care for things all mixed together, but clearly I felt strong enough to take that risk, and it went over well. I know some people believe that children can’t understand gratefulness until they’re older, but when my three year old gets my attention and says “Mommy, I love this meal! Thank you for making this!” I will beg to differ. It was a total win.

Last night I also whipped up some Christmas treats. I originally counted this as a bit of a fail because it wasn’t a complicated treat and they didn’t turn out perfectly. But I can see now that the fact that I even tried counts for something. And they don’t look great, but they’re yummy! So its a win!

Once everyone was down for the night, I remembered to take my medication at the right time, and crocheted an entire toque before going to bed! Win win!

This morning I had the tiniest bit of heartburn brewing within me, but I didn’t panic, and I ate some toast, and it simmered down to nothing. A HUGE win!! Also, it was a good healthy reminder of why I’m still on heartburn medication. Sometimes I get ballsy and think about kicking off of it fast, cold turkey, and its usually right as that idea starts bubbling up that the acid does, too. God knows. I hear You. Currently, that heartburn med is a win, and I’m grateful for it.

Cher came with me this morning to get some snacks from Coop to carry us through the Christmas munchies. I felt scattered and wished I had been more organized. Yet, we got everything we came for! Win!

On top of ALL of these things that felt like flops in the moment, I can say with confidence that there is love and security in my life, with all of our people and all of our relationships. THAT is the biggest win of these bumpy weird days. My failures were really just bumps. I am abounding with gratefulness for the loving people we are blessed to have in our lives.

The season is upon us, and the all the cute things that come with Christmas holidays are upon us! Games and colouring are out in full force! This is the tidiest you’ll see our home for the rest of the calendar year, and lets be real, also January.

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Thank you to Cher and Rae for the activities pictured here 💜

So I’m going to be honest here. You’ve probably noticed this is the absolute latest we’ve put Christmas decorations up, and thats my fault. There is deep grief surrounding me this season, and I could barely wrap my head around putting up things that would take energy I didn’t have, only to have to take the blinking things down so soon after! Feels like a make-work project for me. But alas, the kids ache for normalcy, so we pull it together.

I only cried a couple of times, so thats better than I thought!! 😆💪

I don’t have lots and lots to say about yesterday, as it was such a significant stretch for me, but please enjoy the pictures taken by Brady and Cher 💜

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The boys in the plaid jammies only made the place look more Pinteresty 😍

My mom purchased very special blown glass hand painted ornaments for each child as they celebrated their first Christmas. So our one tradition with decorating the tree is having each child hang their own precious ornament.

It all turned out to be a great success.

Roles may have shifted hard this year, but there is still unity and deep love.

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Thank you, God, for bringing us through this day, and keeping us all peaceful and restful, knowing You are praised outside of all the decorations or traditions.

One of the biggest tasks I have found with having lots of kids is switching out their clothes when they size up. Our kids survive off of hand-me-downs, so clothes are kept all down the line for the next little one to need them. So as you can imagine, we have tubs on tubs on tubs of kids clothes. WAY more than we need. Its one of the biggest things I want to downsize in the near future. Not to pitch everything, but the things I just don’t reach for. Why fill their closet with clothes they’ll never wear? I don’t want to. So one day when I have nothing else to do (so absolutely not even ever once for the rest of my life forever) I’ll sort and purge and feel sooooo much better.

This is a job I put off as long as I can. The three younger kids have been in ill-fitting clothing for so long already, so today as laundry was going, Brady took all the stuff that normally went to Rowan’s closet and decided to put it into Solly’s. Which made total sense and was the right move.

Except then Rowan had next to nothing to wear.

So I ventured under the stairs into the abyss where all the tubs are held. I dug out the 4T and 6T tubs, so I could put Solly’s 4T stuff away and give Rowan some clothes that fit. It was a pretty arduous task but it happened. Solly really enjoyed getting to put all the “keepers” in his closet. “Any more keepers?” after every item. It was cute. He was super happy. Rowan helped hang up all of his new stuff too, and was grateful. Tubs went back downstairs. It was good. Done.

At that point, I figured I was already elbow deep, I may as well catch up Waverly, too. She still had lots of 18-24 month stuff in her closet, and she is wearing 3T now. Of course, I had gone down into the tub months ago and grabbed a handful of items to get us through, but I didn’t go through it all. Should have. But yesterday was the day.

I hauled up the tub of Laela’s 3T clothes, and started pulling stuff out that Wavy would wear, separating out what I knew we wouldn’t use, and pulling old small stuff out of her closet. I had most things out of the tub, but I was leaving behind some summer stuff. Dresses, swimsuits, tank tops and such. As I was digging through those last few items to make sure I hadn’t missed anything, I saw a tshirt sleeve. I grabbed it and pulled it out.

Barf.

Right. That is why I hate switching out their clothes.

Because every time I put away clothes for Solly or Wavy, I feel like a fool, holding onto things that have no purpose. Things that only hurt me to still possess. Things that gather dust and smell like storage. Things that could be serving others but rather, they just sit and stare at me. Just because of maybes. Just because of thin lines of possibility.

Why should I save all of these stupid clothes when there is no one to wear them?? And when there may very well never be someone else to wear them?! Not knowing is miserable, and I am really feeling that today.

So naturally, I put it on the internet 😒

Thank you to those of you who don’t tire of my grief. Its not budging.

When you hear “Christmas list” you probably think of a list of things a kid wants, right? Well, I know many of can see my side of it where my Christmas list is actually a long drawn out list of things that need to get done before the festive season really kicks into high gear.

To be clear, our “high gear” is sooooo lame this year, and thats on purpose. We regularly hang out in first gear over here. As first as possible. And I guess we’re shifting into second for this season, but really, no one is pinning it anywhere this season. Brady has chemo over Christmas :/ and while I’m doing much better on my meds, extra is still too much. So we’re taking it SO easy. I can safely say we’re kicking it into slightly higher low gear. Clear as mud? I thought so.

So. The list. Be gentle, because its a liiiiittle bit sad 😬 So many of you have offered to rescue me, so please know I’m still SO fine here. Things will get done 💜

We still need to put up Christmas. Like… any Christmas. We have zero decor up. In years past, we were the douchebags who lit their tree up on Halloween. But it will get done. The tree itself, as well as the trees above our cabinets. Very very soon.

I have some teacher gifts that I didn’t send to school, because I hadn’t written cards up yet. So I have two to write up still, and then I can deliver here in town. Saved locals for last, I guess.

Someone cooked for us ages ago and I still have their pot. I have to deliver that asap. She might need it over Christmas!

Laundry. Laundry has been rolling all day. I figured if I wash everything we own right at the beginning, I can neglect laundry for the rest of the season 😆 Right?? I put everyone’s socks and underwear into a hamper and it was FULL. Yikes.

My bedroom is on the list. It doesn’t have to be tidy for any real reason, but I want to be able to let down in it, and its hard when its such a mess. But there are crochet projects I’m still trying to pump out and that is the bulk of the mess. So those two things will go hand in hand, since finishing crocheted gifts is also on my list.

My en suite is a wreck. Thats a need.

Brady and I have to get our gifts for the homemade gift exchange out the door and to their rightful owners this weekend.

Brady has a woodworking order to wrap up before Christmas.

I have a mountain of gifts to wrap! Which I actually really love, but currently have zero space to do it because everything is in the state of moving messes right now.

There is still baking, prepping, and organizing I’d like to do, but this is the current running list.

I’ve crossed a couple of things off the list so far. Dekker cleaning up some tape and string he had hanging around to use for decor that he ended up abandoning. I posted on the Homemade Gift Exchange page. I tidied off the island, with Brady’s help. Now he’s at my moms helping her tie up a couple of loose ends, and believe it or not, I’m getting the blog up! Lol!

Whats left on your list?

We’re there, folks. The 2021 part of the school year is coming to a close, and the kiddos will be home with us for two weeks! I have hope for rest and relaxation, along with the few plans we do have that I am very much looking forward to. I’m working hard to do what I can to feel under control and not completely overwhelmed. And we’re getting there 🙂 I think. I hope. We’re definitely trying, at least!

This morning, Cher came early to curl Laela’s hair for school. For the last day of school! Laela was so excited, and ate her breakfast much faster than usual in order to guarantee her time to get her hair done.

Because who doesn’t want to look fly on jammie day?!

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🥺Oof. My heart though. If you ever wanted a glimpse into Laela as a teenager, or an adult, here you have it 💜

She felt beautiful, as she should have. There is no denying that Laela is an incredible girl with overflowing beauty in her heart, but she felt so fancy and special this morning, and it was really good to see. Thank you, Cher, for doing her hair and making her feel like a star.

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Ready for Rowan? 😆

This was pretty funny, hahaha! Blurry but worth it!

As I type this, I’m confident all three of the school kids today are wrapping up their parties, movies, snacks, and whatever other shenanigans they got into today. They will be home before we know it!

Sooooo I guess I’d better hide the presents that are out before they’re back!