The Daily Hailey

I’ve often said that if we all agreed on everything, the world would be boring, because we’d all be the same. Its totally fine that we all do things differently, think differently, and disagree from time to time.

I am aware that the world is bigger than my family, but since you’re here, on my blog, thats the perspective I’m going off of today.

I don’t want to write a long, cliche post about the things that people have said about big families, or about my family, but I’m going to dip into it just a little. Over this last weekend was the first time I really felt offended by the comments of a stranger. And I’ve heard a LOT of things. Some are kind of rude, but for the most part, I think people are just kind of shocked, and accidentally say the wrong thing.

“You guys are crazy! I could never do that!” Thats never hurt me. I know they mean that they just can’t picture how the busyness of many kids would look in their own life. Its FINE!

Then there are the very standard comments that some people are offended by, but I really don’t understand why.

“You’ve sure got your hands full!” They’re not wrong! I do! They’re full of wonderful things, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything, but yes, my hands are FULL! Why are people so offended by this?!

Then there are the jokes. People think they’re SO original, lol!

“You know what causes that, right?” In fact we do! And clearly we’re good at it!

“Are you going for the record?” You aren’t, thats for sure! What are you, a quitter? (To be clear, this one was saved for someone I knew 😉)

The closest I’ve ever come to being offended by those comments was being asked if they all had the same dad. I’m not even sure “offended” was the right word. I was more amused that a stranger would ask me such a question! As if it was their business! If I remember right, I laughed and said something along the lines of “Whoops! Probably shouldn’t ask that!” Lol! How would knowing that piece of information benefit them at all??

And then there was this woman at Superstore this weekend. She barely said anything to me, but it rubbed me SO wrong and I haven’t been able to shake it off since.

We were lined up, putting our groceries on the conveyer belt to check out. There was a woman bagging her groceries on the close side of the aisle, so Brady had to sneak the cart and the kids behind her and around her cart at the end of the aisle to get situated on the other belt. I waited over by the cashier to pay. He politely excused himself past her, and she commented on how he had his hands full. He smiled and said that we do! I laughed a little as I watched Dekker and Laela scrap over pushing the button to get the belt moving. The woman in the close aisle hadn’t noticed me, and upon looking over at me, stares at me in surprise!

“My goodness you have another one!” she exclaimed, pointing at Wavy in the carrier. I laughed and said something, I don’t remember what exactly, confirming that yes, we had another.

And her smile got suuuper fake, then faded, and she said “Ha!… stop…”

I looked back at her for a moment. We just kind of stared at each other. It was so uncomfortable. I finally answered back “Ha… No.”

I looked away and burrowed my face into Wavy’s hair and kissed her head. When I looked up a few seconds later, the lady was gone. I wish I had watched her a little bit longer to see her reaction to my response, but I was so caught off guard. Its probably good that I didn’t, actually.

“The size of my family is none of your concern.”

“You don’t have to be responsible for them, I promise.”

“Wow, that was pretty rude…”

“Leave my family alone, crazy grocery store lady. My children affect you literally not at all. You’re not watching them, paying for them, raising them, shuttling them, or keeping them alive. They add ZERO extra work to your life. You will likely never ever see them again. So shut your ridiculous mouth on the subject.”

That last one probably would’ve been an overreaction…

I’m usually kind of prepared for awkward comments people make towards by family, but this time around, I had nothing. Because she wasn’t being friendly. She didn’t mean well. The air was just different. Even though the conversation was five seconds long, it sat heavy with me for the rest of the day, and continues to nag at me a little. Which is probably why I’m writing it here. To just get it off my chest.

I’m not naive to the fact that people who have no kids get a whole other kind of flack. There are tactless, opinionated people in every avenue, about every avenue. I try to let things roll off my back as smoothly as possible, because my gosh it is SO EASY to offend people these days! I’d so much rather give people the benefit of the doubt. But THIS, I did not like.

I will never NOT feel protective of my children. I’m probably one of the safer people to say the wrong thing around, but if you want a real discussion, you’ve got one.

Aaaaand end rant!