We went to the lake today. We don’t have too many more chances before summer actually starts. We battled whether or not to go today, but decided it would be good to break up the weekend, even if our group was truly exhausted and struggling. Its not been an easy go of it around here as of late. But we’re plodding on, and the lake was going to be a much needed pick me up.
We got to the beach at 11:30, and the kids attacked the playground.
There were just a couple of other people around, but not many. There was a woman (maybe two of them? I don’t remember for sure) running around with a little boy, and two big burly men sitting on a bench nearby. They looked a bit out of place, not at all dressed for the beach, but they had a baby with them, and seemed to be along with the woman and little boy.
At Waskesiu, there are two play areas on the beach. They’re very close to each other – think a five second run – but they’re separate. Brady and I watched the kids migrate from the bigger playground to the one more geared towards younger kids. So began their instant friendship with the little boy we had seen. He was stoked to have all these new friends, and our kids chased him up and down the ramps, played tag with him, and seemed to have a hoot. It was cute to watch.
Brady and I were keeping an eye out, always counting heads, but we were hanging out on a nearby bench, playing with Wavy and watching over out stroller full of rejected hoodies, shoes, and water bottles. I noticed that woman I assumed to be the little boys mom had gone over to join the fun. She seemed pretty smitten with the fact that her super cute kid had all these new friends!
And then she started taking pictures of them. As in, posing them together on a bench, motioning to make sure all of our kids were in it.
Huh.
I said to Brady “Is she taking pictures of them?” and he almost sighed, and confirmed that she was. “Well, thats not ok.”
I don’t have to tell you guys that a red flag went up. Truthfully, it was already up. Those men sitting on that bench hadn’t budged, and they weren’t interacting with the woman we thought they were with. So we were already on alert. And then this. I do NOT like to assume the worst in people, but it felt like an appropriate time to go join the group. It was lunch time anyway.
AS SOON AS I WALKED OVER TO THE KIDS, SHE LEFT. QUICKLY.
SO DID THE MEN ON THE BENCH.
We got the hell out of there.
We were there for less than 40 minutes.
I admit, I was completely shaken. We loaded the kids up into the van, and they cried and complained as we buckled them in. We had promised them a long time of play on the beach, and then a picnic. And we were not making good on that promise. We drove to find a spot to park that wasn’t at the beach, and started serving out the makings of our picnic in the van.
I flip flopped hard on what to say to the kids. I didn’t know how to talk to them about what happened without scaring the pants off of them. But if I’m being honest, losing a child is easily my biggest fear. When I see those terrifying stories of people having their children abducted, I have to look away or I’ll never sleep again. But I couldn’t be ignorant today.
So I got everyone’s attention and we discussed what had happened at the playground. How they were having so much fun, and that maybe that little boys mom was just so happy he had friends. BUT, she should not be taking their picture without asking for a parents permission. And she, as an adult, knows that. We talked about how probably she meant no harm and probably everything was totally safe. BUT, we need to be so careful, and always abide by safety rules. We talked about NEVER going anywhere with a stranger, even a really, really friendly one. We were able to reiterate a big one that we talk about a lot around here. Screaming. In our house, screaming is for emergencies only. So we said, if a stranger ever took their hand and tried to lead them away, SCREAM! As LOUD as you can, SCREAM! That is the right time!
Our kids listened intently and responded to what I was saying all along the way. They had questions, and I answered truthfully. It got into very raw territory, talking about how there are people out there who take kids, and hurt kids, and how this lady probably wasn’t one of those, BUT there are rules we have to follow. We don’t need to be afraid of everybody, but we need to be careful.
They understood, and I died on the inside. HOW is the world like this?!?! HOW do I even have to have this conversation with them??
After some thought and prayer, we hit the RCMP station, but the officer on duty was out patrolling. So we called 911 and they helped us get connected to the officer we needed. Thank you, Brady, for making that awful call.
He stepped out of the van to give the officer a breakdown of what had happened. We had seen them loading into their vehicle and Brady was with it enough to grab the plate number and make and model of the vehicle. The officer was attentive and recounted the story back to Brady to make sure he hadn’t missed anything. He said he’d do some laps around town, and go ask at a few business near where their vehicle was parked, but beyond that, a file was opened.
While Brady was on the phone with the RCMP officer, the kids told me that the lady on the beach had initiated all the pictures, and was asking their ages.
There wasn’t much more that could be done. But that was all we needed. Reassurance that they were recorded, in case anyone else reports the same thing of the same people. He’ll call if anything comes of it.
Our kids, while very understanding of the situation, were very disappointed to leave so soon. I was too. I LOVE Waskesiu, but today, I was more than happy to see it go. I was SO shaken. Still am.
We promised our sad little troop some ice cream, so we did that on our way home.
A yummy supper is in the oven already, and we have high hopes of some outside play and music videos before bed. We all wanted a fun, relaxing day and rather, we’re all kind of emotionally exhausted and rattled.
So. All that said. What is a person to do in a situation, like at a big playground, when you can headcount to your hearts content but it is physically impossible to keep an eye on every child every second? Help me, friends. I’ve thought about a buddy system, but does that put too much responsibility one the older “buddy?”
My heart is shaky. I’m rattled. I don’t know what I’d do. The “what ifs” are useless and also rampant.
Pray for peaceful hearts for all of us, please.