The Daily Hailey

One year ago…

The timeline of this gorgeous day is messy. I look back now and of course I wish I had kept better track of when things were happening. I will likely be more on the ball with whichever babies follow in the years to come.  However, the forgetfulness properly documents that Dekker was my first child and I was new. What a perfect day.

I woke up around 7:00 am on Saturday August 20^th, 2011 with some suspicious “leaking.” Brady and I immediately got excited. The baby was coming!!! However, I was having no signs of labor whatsoever. So I called my mom and she agreed that I should likely go get checked, just to be safe. I then called the health line and they agreed. “Go to the hospital” they said, as they had said so many times while I was pregnant. So while we packed our last minute stuff, I felt a little silly. I wasn’t laboring, which according to every chart and video, I was supposed to be doing. I knew they would just send us home and say to wait for more to start happening. But I had also heard horror stories about people whose water broke and were sent home, and they got terrible infections, as did their babies. I felt kind of torn, and I didn’t even know what was going to happen yet! Classic over thinker. We left the house shortly after 8:00 am. I think.

We got the to hospital around 9:00. I had quite the belly when I was pregnant and as soon as I walked into the emergency room the lady at the desk said “Wow, are you having a baby?!” I had to say that I didn’t know! So I told her what had happened and she said that I needed to be wheeled up, and that was just the policy with any kind of leaking. So I gave them all my information and Brady wheeled me to the elevators and to our first room. I was put in a room and was there for quite some time before anyone even came to see us. We took funny pictures of me in the blue gown and stalled and laughed and had a fun time.

I still wasn’t even admitted, they needed to make sure it was my water that had broken, and not that I had accidentally just peed myself or something awkward like that. After a while, Dr. Boechler (a resident) and Lindsay (an intern) came to check me out. They asked if Lindsay could do my exams for practice and I said yes. That was the worst mistake I made that day, hahaha! Those exams are quite painful and she was nooo kind of gentle! She used large tools and moved roughly and quick. I cried, and she got very impatient with me. This didn’t seem to make her feel any more sympathetic. It was tough. She would uncover me so I was completely vulnerable, and then she would leave to go do something and leave me completely uncovered. I thank the Lord for Dr. Boechler who would come cover me. She examined me two or three times, and after all of that, she was unsure about how far dilated I might be. So Dr. Boechler had to double check for her. Miscellaneous fact: Men’s fingers are larger than women’s fingers, no matter how dainty. However, he was apologetic and went nice and slow. I was only 1.5 to 2 cm dilated, which is very early. They swabbed me and didn’t find any amniotic fluid, which was discouraging. So after the exams, the doctors left and Brady and I just hung around and talked while we waited, as no one had really told us what happened next. We were laughing about something (of course I don’t remember what it was) and suddenly – I peed. It was crazy! I burst out laughing out of embarrassment and every time I would let another laugh out I would pee more! It was horrifying! Lindsay came back into our room and told us they weren’t going to admit me since I wasn’t in labor at all. I mentioned to her that “something gross happened.” She seemed surprised when she lifted the sheet up. She went to get Dr. Boechler and he swabbed the fluid, smiled, and showed me the swab that had turned dark blue, showing amniotic fluid! It was so exciting! From there on, I was known as “the woman who laughed so hard she broke her water.”

So I was finally admitted, moved to another room (about three doors down that same hallway) and I awaited labor. Brady and I tried to watch some Big Bang Theory while nurses came in and out and put monitors on my belly, took monitors off, checked my blood pressure, etc. I met the on-call doctor and she checked me out to see what progress I was making. None so far. Another miscellaneous fact: Wearing gel nails while giving a cervical exam is awful and should be outlawed. Who do people think they are anyway? Either way, I wasn’t progressing yet.  At this point it was likely noon-ish. (Again, didn’t think to check the time.) I was informed that if I wasn’t in active labor by the time visiting hours were over, Brady would have to leave. I would have none of that so I agreed to get things rolling. I was given Cervadil, which is a tampon-like medication that is used for “light induction” that was supposed to “ripen” my cervix. Yet another miscellaneous fact: Light induction isn’t real. Serious induction however, is a real thing. Within 15 minutes (I think) I was contracting all over the place. This being my first labor, I don’t have anything to compare it to, but after not even an hour of labor, I had heard several nurses saying amongst themselves things like “Her labor is terrible, poor girl! She’s getting maaaybe 15 seconds between contractions!” So it wasn’t in my head, which was a relief. I labored that way for about an hour or two before I needed to be checked again. I was truly relieved when Dr. Boechler came into my room. This man followed my whole labor and delivery, and was easily the most caring health care professional I worked with. The world needs more Dr. Boechlers. He came in to check me, and said he’d try to wait until my current contraction was over. Unfortunately, such tiny breaks in between didn’t leave room for that so I was examined anyway with many apologies from him. He said I wasn’t dilating which was pretty discouraging consider how hard my labor was. It was suggested that I take a little pain medication and get in the jetted tub. I’m never one to turn down a bath so I took the Gravol/Morphine magic mix and got in the warm tub.

I sat across the short way in the tub. Brady sat in front of me with his legs in the water. Every time I had a contraction I would lean forward and Brady would brace his fists on my lower back and put some pressure there. It worked wonders. A few times I heard a nurse come in but I don’t know what they wanted. From about that point on, Brady did most of my communicating. I genuinely don’t know if I ever opened my eyes while I was in the tub. And all of a sudden I had been in there for about 2.5 hours. I decided to get out at that point because I knew labor was getting harder and the longer I hung out in the tub, the worse it was going to be when I got out. I got out and limped my way back to my room where I had a “Brady, I don’t know what to do! It hurts! *Insert profanity here!!* Ouch!” contraction. I only had one of those panicky ones, and then I moved back to breathing and being in my own weird labor zone. Needless to say, I asked for an epidural. From the moment I asked for one to the moment I had one that was in full working order was about three hours. A looong wait, but it passed relatively quickly. It went from asking for one, to Dr. Boechler coming to check me (I was at 5 cm, woohoo!) to waiting and waiting, to being wheeled up a floor. I should actually add in there that trying to get into that wheelchair was pretty tough. Just standing up was tough! We tried to get me in between contractions but as I’ve said, there wasn’t time. I was plunked in a chair and rushed up pretty quick. Not because I was about to deliver, but because it hurt.

I waited in the room where I would later deliver my son. The anesthesiologist came in and gave me the pro/con list of epidurals. It is very low risk now, which is nice to know for the person who is agreeing to have a needle put in their spine. I was so blessed to have a good anesthesiologist who didn’t give me a migraine, I was so blessed that they put a freezing balm on my back first so I didn’t feel the needle, and I was even more blessed to have the longest break between contractions I had through the entire labor when he put in my epidural. When another contraction was coming on, I was holding as still as possible, and when I finally buckled and asked if I could move, he said yes! I was done, and it was easy. I was assured that these things should be in full working order in 15 minutes. Miscellaneous fact number four: That is not a guarantee. I was in a lot of pain still a good half hour later, so they gave me a button to push every 15 minutes to give myself another shot of the medicine until it was working. Three shots later I was in good shape, completely comfortable. Such a relief!

I decided it was naptime and Brady realized he had barely eaten all day so he went to the Subway across the street and I rested for the first time all day, pain free. Dr. Boechler woke me up maybe 15-20 minutes later to check my progress. I don’t really know how long I actually slept but Brady wasn’t back from Subway yet. The doctor warned me that some people, even with the epidural, found the cervical checks uncomfortable. He then checked me (totally painlessly) and seemed a little surprised when he said I was completely dilated and effaced! I remember commenting after he checked me without me crying about how he probably liked me a lot better now. He looked me right in the eye and said “I like you just the same.” Our only problem was that baby hadn’t moved down at all. He gave a call to the new doctor on call to see what she wanted us to do. She said to let my epidural wear off and for me to sit up straight, and maybe that would coax baby down. So I spent the next…while…back in pain. I didn’t have the pressure that I was supposed to be feeling, but I felt pain again! I mentioned it to the nurse who was in our room with us and she seemed to think this method of moving baby down wasn’t working.  She mentioned it to Dr. Boechler and he called Dr. Cameron back to see if she still wanted me in this position. At this point, Dr. Cameron had not met me and didn’t know much about our case. So I believe that she was doing what she thought was best when she said to keep going on no epidural. When Dr. Boechler came and told us that, I felt a little deflated but I new that the big moment would come soon anyway. After he left the nurse seemed a little flustered, and made a quiet comment about how, for some reason, she hadn’t unhooked my button yet, and if I chose to push it another one or two times, that would be fine. Yay! So I drugged myself up a little extra and felt comfortable again. Our nurse brought me a pineapple Popsicle as I hadn’t eaten since that morning and we waited.

She was a lovely nurse. When I had yet more fluid suddenly and dramatically make its way out of me, she just laughed and laughed and cleaned me all up. Part of the general line up of events is that the mother needs her bladder to be empty before she delivers. The nurse let me go try to pee but having no feeling in my lower half made it near impossible so we had a good laugh over that too, and she just chucked a catheter in there and took care of it for me. It was weird to hear myself pee and not feel it.

A while later Dr Boechler came back in just o see how we were all doing. I guess Dr. Cameron wasn’t in the hospital yet and he was just waiting like the rest of us. He brought another round of Popsicles and we had yet another laugh when we discovered that I STILL had a bag of water that hadn’t broken! So he broke my water. Again.

Finally, Dr. Cameron came in, and brought Lindsay with her. She said straight out that I likely wasn’t ready to deliver, as my baby still hadn’t come down, but she did offer me that I could do a trial push and just see how things went. I pushed, using all my strength, and all my knowledge from all the baby shows I’ve watched in my life, and baby moved down! We were ready to push!

I began pushing at 11:20 pm. I know that for a fact. I pushed for a total of one hour and fifteen minutes. My room consisted of very few people. There was me (I was the star) and there was Brady and the nice nurse who gave me extra epidural. They helped me hold my legs up while I pushed. Then there were Dr. Cameron, Dr. Boechler, and Lindsay. They alternated approximately every three contractions being in the baby-catching position. Each one had a different approach. Dr. Cameron was professional, more quiet, and then between contractions she would talk with everyone about weekend plans, etc. Lindsay had the scary “GET MAD! GET MAD!” approach of getting the baby out using the “anger” that I didn’t actually have. I was feeling wonderful, I wasn’t in pain, and I was delivering my first child. Dr. Boechler would call my baby by name while I pushed, tell me how wonderful I was doing, and anytime I looked up, he was watching me. Even between contractions. I definitely felt like a person with him, not bed number whatever.

At certain points during pushing, I was offered to be able to feel how far out the baby’s head was. It was surreal to know he was already half a head out! Turns out that half a head out isn’t quite enough and his little melon got stuck. However, because of my awesome epidural, I wasn’t in pain. Therefore I wasn’t panicking, my blood pressure was good, and so was the baby’s, which is the most important thing. I was having a great time, loving the experience, and then all of a sudden, he was on my chest. He had such a large gurgly cry for such a little boy. His color was beautiful; he barely had any blood on him or anything. He had lots of hair on his head, and a little calcium deposit thing in his right eyebrow. He had wide hands with long fingers. He had a square shaped birthmark on his right thigh.  He had a very long tongue that he stuck out at me right away, just in case I was curious . He was huge. He was perfect.

 Dekker Thomas Born entered the world on Sunday, August 21^st, 2011 at 12:35 am. He weighed 10 lbs 10 oz and was 22” long. He was a huge hit that weekend in Royal University Hospital, no pun intended. Well, maybe a little bit intended.