Christmas wasn’t all that long ago, but I want to reflect on a few parts of it. Bear with me, for a minute.
Its not a secret that it was a difficult Christmas season for us. Honestly, I think a lot of people felt this Christmas was a bit heavier than usual. I have a large handful of people I know who struggled this holiday season, all for entirely different reasons. Ours was sickness. The kids all got sick mid-November, and now that I think of it, I remember that Brady had a cold just before that. So it began even earlier. And it lasted aaaaall through Christmas. While we’re all pretty much done with it (knock on wood) Laela and I are still congested, and Rowan is still coughing. But thats beside the point. It was a hard Christmas.
Its not a new concept that its good to help each other out. Its really good to reach out and meet the needs of others, and to help someone up when they’re down. I know this. I’ve always known this. But this Christmas was a serious reminder about just how much of an impact it can make! Its more than just bringing someone some food one day. Its saving the time of prep. Its saving you from the fuss standing over a hot stove while wrangling kids, having to constantly leave to blow your nose, then wash your hands, then return to the food just in time to have your nose start running again. Its providing tomorrow’s lunch. One simple gift of a meal can have a bigger effect than one maybe thinks of at first. And we were blessed countless times in this way, among others.
Brady and I barely cooked over Christmas. We were gifted supper a handful of times. We were given baking a handful of times. A loving neighbour came over and babysat our whole sick brood on Christmas Eve while their entire family was gathered together for a couple of days. Heck, our tire shop gave us a fabulous price on winter tires! Blessings overflowed for us this Christmas, and honestly, we really really needed them.
I’ve said before, I’m very confident in our decision to have a big family, and in feeling that confidence, I’m not too concerned about other’s opinions about us. We’ve entered our decisions prayerfully, and have confidence in Christ. But this Christmas, I realized I do have a bit of a pride issue. It was hard for me to need so much help, and embarrassingly enough, the hardest part about it was my fear that people would think I wasn’t capable of caring for my kids. Because at times, I didn’t feel capable of caring for them. I was SO broken about not being able to heal them up and get everyone healthy. Every time there was a glimmer of health, the next illness rolled on in, and I was SO discouraged.
In stepping back a bit, when we’ve seen some improvement around here, I’ve been able to clear my head and I know that, whether I had no kids or ten kids, seven weeks of sickness is a LOT! I would likely have felt just deeply burrowed in sorrow and struggle as I did with my four kids. I keep privately wondering if this all had to happen so I would realize my pride, and get that business back in check. NO ONE is above needing help. EVER. As my loving neighbour reminded me, it takes a village to raise children, and I have seen just how many amazing people we have in our village!
So as I reflect on Christmas, I have learned that the impact of reaching out and meeting a need without being asked is bigger than I thought, and bigger than I could have known had I not been in a position of needing help. It was quite a big lesson. I learned a lot this Christmas.
Without this being super resolutiony, I want this lesson to ring in my heart throughout the year. And throughout my life. I don’t want to put any amount or time stamp on it, but I want to challenge myself not to wait to be asked for help, but to keep my eyes and ears open always, and meet needs as best as I can as they come around. Because not only can it help in a tangible way sometimes, but I hope I can make people feel as loved and thought of and cared for as I have been made to feel these last few weeks.
To those of you who reached out to us, cared for us, and made sacrifices for us, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am humbled in the best way. Thank you for seeing our needs, and meeting them with love. This Christmas would not have had such sweet notes in it if not for you. 💜